


quest log 3 16

by asterbells



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, MatsuHana Zine, i snuck in es21 i'm not even sorry, rated t bc pottymouths smh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-10-20 01:14:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10651920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asterbells/pseuds/asterbells
Summary: Or that one time Matsukawa Screwed Up.My piece for theMatsuHana Zine!





	quest log 3 16

**Author's Note:**

> i feel like i should preface this saying that while i remember writing this i literally do not remember writing this hello,
> 
> also this is like, super late but, alas,
> 
> this was my work for the [matsuhana zine](https://twitter.com/MatsuHanaZine/status/852884275514884097)! please check it out! our amazing mod did such a wonderful job and everyone's contributions are Very Good

* * *

 

“Oh come on, you know you love me.”

 

Hanamaki glares, unrelenting. “I’d sell you to Satan for one cheese hamburg steak.”

 

“We work for Oikawa, Makki, we already serve Satan.” Matsukawa comments drily. “You don’t even  _ like _ cheese hamburg steak,  _ I _ like cheese hamburg steak, you like—”

 

“I  _ know _ what I like thank you very much,” Hanamaki scoffs, “And I know what you like as well, which is why you’ll be catching me eat melted cheesy hamburg steak while I watch you get dragged away to get prattled at for the next hundred years about how  _ Iwa-chan is actually helping that stupid Tobio-chan and Chibi-chan can you believe this _ .”

 

Hanamaki storms off with a huff, leaving Matsukawa behind, mildly repentant and vaguely insulted.

 

This is all Oikawa’s fault. It’s always Oikawa’s fault.

 

* * *

 

_ “Makki! Mattsun!” _

 

_ “Yes Your Royal Pointiness?” _

 

_ “Yes Your Most Benevolent Evilness?” _

 

_ Scowling, Oikawa grumbles, “The disrespect, my  _ own subordinates _.” _

 

_ Matsukawa simply waggles his eyebrows while Hanamaki snickers into his hands. _

 

_ “But Your Most Devilish Highness! Are we not your most loyal and dutiful soldiers?” Hanamaki grins. “Must we once again prove our endless loyalty that keeps us from running off to join a rebellious group of genius adventurers destined to take down the demon king?” _

 

_ The glare Oikawa throws at Hanamaki would have easily cowered any other, but it’s his words that wipe the smile off his face. _

 

_ “Yes, actually Makki, thank you for volunteering yourself to fetch me an Orb of Mystery.” _

 

_ “WHAT.” _

 

_ “You heard me,” Oikawa smiles smugly. “I need it to make a scrying orb and you  _ know _ how scrying orbs made from anything less don’t see shit.” _

 

_ “YOU ALREADY HAVE ONE. YOU USE IT ALL THE TIME. WHY DO YOU NEED ANOTHER.” _

 

_ “Because a traitor who ran off to join a rebellious group of silly adventurers destined to go nowhere took mine with him so I need a new one of course!” _

 

_ Matsukawa makes a quiet retreat. _

 

* * *

 

“And?” Kiyoko raises an eyebrow. “The last I heard, Hanamaki-san had succeeded in his quest and brought back an Orb of Mystery. What seems to be the problem?”

 

The problem is, that when Hanamaki came back, Matsukawa kind of maybe ran into him after a sharp corner, and, kind of maybe knocked Hanamaki into the ground, and,  _ kind of maybe crushed the Orb of Mystery under his foot it was an accident I swear _ .

 

Kiyoko gives him a very judgey stare.   
  


* * *

 

The thing about these orbs is that, they’re either super hard to find (read: the center of tornadoes, buried under molten lava, the whole shebang) or super expensive to buy (read: minimum two castle’s worth of fortune, your soul, triple what’s most important to you). 

 

Honestly he isn’t quite sure how Makki got an honest-to-gods Orb of Mystery but there really isn’t a need when he can just—

 

“Thanks Iwaizumi, really appreciate it.”

 

“Yeah no worries. Sorry I made so many problems for you guys.” Iwaizumi shrugs, handing over Oikawa’s scrying orb. “Had to make sure that dumbass wouldn’t be able to see me leave.”

 

Matsukawa grins wryly. “He woke up the entire castle trying to find you y’know.”

 

Iwaizumi just shrugs again. 

 

“Tell him I’ll go back when he stops being so stupid.”

 

* * *

 

The thing about cream puffs is that, they can be found just about anywhere, any bakery, any town. The thing about  _ good _ cream puffs is that, while rarer, can at least be found at least one bakery, per town. The thing about  _ The _ Cream Puffs, is that not only do they deserve capitalization and emphasis, they can only be found at one (1) bakery in the entire realm.

 

The fact that it happens to be Deimon, home to possibly the only demon more batshit-insane than Oikawa and Kuroo combined, is something Matsukawa is very readily not thinking about right now.

 

Five bribes, two blackmails, four bargains, one really heavy bag of gold coins, and a really large chunk of his day later finally sees Matsukawa walking away from the red-headed baker cheerily waving him off with a box of  _ The  _ Cream Puffs in hand.

 

Matsukawa sighs. The things he does for love.

 

* * *

 

“I love you.”

 

“You know I basically went on an entire quest for those right.”

 

“I love you so much.”

 

“I’m going to go to every guild and update their quest logs this is like, S rank, at least.”

 

“I love you more than there are stars in the sky.”

 

“ _ Deimon _ , fucking  _ Deimon _ .”

 

“Let’s get married.”

 

“I want a ring. From Deimon. Handcrafted.”

 

“How about a Cream Puff.”

 

“Sold.”

 

* * *

 

**Author's Note:**

> if u caught the eyeshield 21 reference i love u
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/asterbelis)


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